When we are in public with our precious human, we get lots of compliments, like most parents do with their babies. It always starts off with "oh she is so chubby/pretty/beautiful". Of course, this mama's heart feels like exploding! Then 90% of the time, this is the follow up question:
well meaning stranger: "Is she walking yet?"
me: " No, not yet"
well meaning stranger: "Oh she must be crawling, how's that"
me (starting to feel foolish): "Actually she's not yet".
Then, I KID you not, comes the gasp, or horrified look. Or this, because its happened a few times:"What!?! Really, that's crazy". I have had the same comment said to me by some people we know. If you are reading this, don't worry it wasn't you.
Thanks stranger, because its not like I am already not stressed about it.
It makes me feel like a worthless mama, so then I feel obligated to dive into her story. I explain she's a preemie, that her adjusted age is really barely 10 months, etc. etc. Usually then, the stranger then feels bad, launches into a story about so-so who didn't crawl till 12 months, etc.
On facebook, there was a bunch of us pregnant at the same time (I think 11 of us?), and I had about 4 friends due in the fall. All but me were born at term. All of those babies crawled between 7-9 months, one even at 6. Some of those said babies were walking well before they turned 1. Seeing these posts, seeing these babies be on the crazy move makes my heart ache and worry. It made me feel something was wrong with Rowan, I am not doing enough, etc. etc. I recently ran into this quote and totally felt it was from God:
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I think I need to tattoo this on my head. Just sayin'.
Comparing Rowan to other babies, is so incredibly wrong. And it sure has stolen my joy. She is her own unique, beautiful self. I keep repeating that quote to myself quite often!
Even with this, I felt in my heart we need to get checked out, just in case. So I scheduled an appointment with her physical therapist. She has always been great and is a massive help.
She first observed Rowan play. She then picked her up in different ways and felt her hips. She then explained her muscles and hips felt just fine. Phew!
Next, she showed us different ways to help encourage crawling.
Then she shared this bit of news....
Rowan is not delayed.
Let me repeat that to myself, Rowan is not delayed. She shared with me that the "norm" for crawling can go from 7 months to 12 months. I felt like cheering. I felt like shoving that info into people's faces who unintentionally made me feel like crap.
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Rowan is mobile, but not in the traditional sense of crawling. She also shared a huge nugget...SOME BABIES DON'T CRAWL. PERIOD.
I held on to her every word, feeling relieved there wasn't anything wrong with my sweet pea.
Then, something crazy happened...
Dr. Hixon had a colorful, tall, noisy toy that Rowan didn't have. It played loud music and it peaked her interest immediately. She then started to pull herself, and move her thighs. Within a second, she started army crawling, which is technically another form crawling. We all looked at her move, stunned. Dr. Hixon shook her head and laughed. She said "It's almost like she needed motivation". As she was saying this, Rowan was now army crawling to different toys. This mama was ELATED!!! Finally, something!!!!
You have got to be kidding me though, she needed to be motivated?!?! Is she lazy?? LOL!!!!!!!!
The funny thing is, we DO work with her. She has awesome toys. However, this girl needed a boost from a stranger to get her going. OH ROWAN.
Rowan is now on the prowl even more than ever, army crawling and rolling every which way, getting into even more mischief. She is more confident in pulling herself up, except she likes to pull up on things that aren't sturdy and/or they are light weight, which makes her mad. Rowan still very much loves to stand and bounce.
I am overjoyed and thrilled. However, I had to have a "come to Jesus" talk with myself. I have been pretty disappointed in myself and getting all worked up over this milestone crap. Comparing truly is a thief of joy. Instead of obsessing about her crawling, I need to be enjoying her, because babies sure as heck don't keep.
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